Using the scenario my wife finally confessed to, factors came into play. Depressive and stress of homelife, discontent with me, (this is the night after “happily” celebrating our first double-digit wed anni?) She knew the guy back when she was 17, before meeting me. He certainly was no “upgrade”, but he was married also. I’m sure there was the spouse talk and what they were unhappy with, by this point she is 4 drinks in at least, defenses are down, he finds the moment to lean in and kiss her and she doesn’t fight it.

The niece was pretty sure though after trying to dissuade her from walking outside, she knew what she could be getting into, your not that far gone on drinks. She was looking for release on a flight of fantasy of the moment, nothing else mattered. Not our anniversary, not the kids at home, not tomorrow and certainly not me. I had to embrace the idea that life happens, either you married a loyalist, or married a weak willed, easy to turn spouse. Maybe age and wisdom mean something later on, but sometimes the wild fires break out if your not careful.

Edit here for the scenario that actually covers this question on the “Older Man” that I forgot to add. She said it didn’t happen, but 3 of us believe it did, her niece, my sister and myself based on suggestive evidence, some of it was by her own words. There was the name dropping in many conversations, more with her niece, but with myself as well. He (B.B.) was the lead tech supervisor, 40sh and married also. She was in customer service and worked between the customers and techs. I believe she saw qualities in him she didn’t see in me, yet. He was lead over other techs, he was Mr. Fix-it and very knowledgeable in repairs. The conversation with my sister about the tech-training seminar that was out of town and overnight went like this, “So we get there and check into our rooms, then (B.B.) and I went back downstairs to the restaurant bar, we sat and talked and had a few drinks. Then we went back up to his room and talked,…😯🫢…ohh no, no, no it was nothing like that!”…Well, my sister was convinced enough that she pulls me off after I wake up for my 3rd shift job, and tells me, “you have a big problem,…”. She says it didn’t happen, but there it is.

Marriage of both is never a guarantee intimacy won’t happen, it just means they have common ground and something to talk about to start it all off, and both know they have something to hide together.